Fortunately, there was an extinguisher in the house- unfortunately, it’s contents were out the window, icing the grass. I sighed. Apparently, the lack of food wasn’t the only thing that resulted from Goldenrod’s little party .
“Hey, let me out! It’s dark in here!” She cried.
“No way! Not after you decided to burn my skirt- it’s my choice to decide whether it’s ugly or not!”
“Well, what can I say? You made the wrong choice!”
I groaned, snapping the pocket shut, leaving it only open enough for her to breath. I decided to take action, closing off my mind to the muffled sounds. I had to figure out a way to put out the fire before the Fire Department came, to put it out themselves. Now, if a fire alarm went on for over two minutes, the Fire Department was automatically notified, and would race over to your house- and all they would find in her home was a loony fairy, an annoyed girl, and a very singed skirt. And they punished people with extra years working at a fairy company for no pay , if it was a false alarm. I was doomed. And it was all Goldenrod’s fault!
In the bathroom, I saw a horrible mess. Dangerous sparks were flying all over the room, ashes littered the tile, and there was my skirt, in the middle, half burnt to a crisp, sitting under the sink. It was still smoldering, and I felt my heart break. It was my most comfortable skirt, and I had happened to like the pattern! Too bad that it was beyond saving. My bathroom would be, as well, in just a minute.
I began to panic. How was I supposed to fix everything, so that my parents would never find out that the bathroom that they had just fixed up was ablaze? How could I explain that it was the fairy, and not me?
The smoke was beginning to condense in my throat, and I had no other strategy besides ducking low, and hoping I wasn’t breathing in too much of the fatal, rolling, fire-hair.
Then, I had an idea.
I saw the sink in the bathroom, and switched on the squeaky clean, silver faucets, and I plugged up the drain. Goldenrod struggled to get out of my pocket, but I would not allow that to happen. Who could have told me that she would ruin everything? What would she do next, blow up the sofa?
The water began to run out of the tap, cascading down into the empty basin. It wouldn’t be empty for long, I knew, as I turned up the water pressure. The bowl began to overflow, over the white, speckled grantite. It pooled over a dent in the stone, dripping down, gently into the flame. That wasn’t enough. I decided to turn it up even higher, to the highest point.
Whoosh.
The waterworks had commenced, pouring down into the fire, and it started to dampen the waves of embers that flew into the air, like burning hot fireflies. I allowed myself to let out a sigh of relief. The bathroom wasn’t harmed at all, and I could always clean up the water before the room started to flood.
“That should do it,” I said, about to turn off the tap, “now, all we have to do is call the Fire Department and tell them not to come. They probably haven’t even left yet-“
All of a sudden, I heard a fierce rapping on the bathroom door. My heart fluttered, and I automatically regretted not locking it. It seemed like the worst problem I was having today was that I didn’t lock my doors. What if it was a Genie, still bitter and spiteful from losing the war? What if it was an elf, here to arrest me for borrowing that car, even if I had brought it back?
“Um,” I cried, “I’m busy! I’m...”
I took a hasty glance at the flowing water.
“I’m taking a shower! How about coming back, later?”
“She’s not taking a shower!” Goldenrod tattled, “and the door’s unlocked! Come right in!”
I glanced at my pocket, and realized that she had popped her head right through the opening. I blasphemed my cheaply made pockets, and made the decision to buy a new outfit, with lots of pockets to keep angry, annoying fairies. Not that I planned to ever have one again, after this ordeal. Who’d want to?
She cackled lightly, as a huge, steel tipped boot began to barged through the door.
A burly gang of Firefighters, most wearing boots, but one wearing a slicked pair of brogues, began to fight their way through the door, and I winced as their boots almost hit the freshly painted wood. The legend that Firefighters were cuter than average was somewhat true, but they weren’t so cute when they were about to break my entire bathroom, when there was no cause for it at all .
“Get out of the room, Miss,” one breathed heavily through his mask, distorting his voice, “we can handle thi-“
Then, he saw the “ massive fire”- just a pile of skirt soufflé on the floor, and he sighed.
“This happens more often than actual fires!” He cried, slapping his forehead.
“It’s probably because of the ridiculous new fire alarms that are connected to us, for some reason.” One muttered.
“Man, why don’t we get paid for this? This was supposed to be volunteer work, I’m not here to follow red herrings and let houses burn down!”
And that was exactly why fire alarms shouldn’t be connected to the Fire Department. Not to mention that they probably got way too many calls per day. Maybe it was just a ploy of the fairies, so that humans would work for them for free? I didn’t have the time to dwell on it, for more than a split second, because something was making the Firefighters extremely uncomfortable.
Suddenly, the man in the brogues burst through the crowd of very confused Firemen. His clean shaven head, and face made him look rather imposing, and the wrinkles lining his face, especially on his forehead, was certainly not from smiling often. He wasn’t tall, not even close. He was about the same height as she was, yet he looked as frightening as anyone could. The other men stood at attention, facing him, their posture upright. One man, face shielded, sniggered, and he turned on him, fast as breathing.
“What do you think you’re doing?” He rasped, coughing into his palm.
“Well...this girl’s bathroom is flooded, she must have put the fire out herself. It wasn’t her fault that we came-“
“Do you think this is a game? We have a legal duty to give her a due punishment! Girl, what’s your name?”
“Uh... Livi.”
I suddenly became fixated on one particular, unburnt stitch, which was suddenly the most interesting thing in the world.
“Well, Livi , you’re going to come with us, down to the station. You sent us on a false alarm call- do you know what that means? Three extra years, volunteering at a fairy company. You really shouldn’t have done that, but you did,” he said, glee in his tone.
That was entirely unfair! I hadn’t started the fire- my fairy should be forced to work for her own kind! That was the way the system should have worked from the beginning!
“Sir,” I muttered.
“You’ll have to speak up if you want to be heard!”
“Sir, if you’d excuse me, I need to tell you that this wasn’t my fault. My awful fairy, who I just got yesterday, decided to set fire to my clothing in the bathroom, after she and her friends trashed my kitchen. Shouldn’t you punish her?”
“Hey,” Goldenrod protested, “we cleaned that kitchen!”
The man, who was probably the Chief, stood, eye to eye with me for a lengthy few seconds. He looked suspiciously at the soap and the toothbrush on the counter, like that was abnormal and treasonous, to have. After he had cleared his throat, he began to speak. And that was when I learned that I didn’t want him to open his mouth around me, ever again.
“We don’t punish fairies for their
humans mistakes. That excuse is as old as time, and I’m not going to fall for that old trick!” He guffawed.
Then, he ushered me out the door, leaving the floor sopping wet. I was shunted through the living room, dripping water all over the ground. He had no concern for the amount of time that I hit into walls, and he cared even less about the Firefighters, whom he just left behind. I was shouldered and pushed out the door, onto my stoop, panting and shivering a bit, out in the breezy air.
“Chief, I don’t think this is the right thing to do. Can’t you just let it slide? We’re not supposed to arrest people, and she’s a minor!” The man who had upset him, said.
He ignored the Firefighter, and tossed me into the backseat of the Firetruck, slamming the door behind me.
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